Sunday, December 13, 2015

Questions to ask before you get married

It’s now more common for marriages to fail than it is for them to last a lifetime. But we can still get married with the confidence that we will enjoy the healthy, holy marriage God wants us to have if we invest time before getting married into asking wise questions. Making time to consider key questions will help us and our future spouse head in the right direction: one that leads toward God’s purposes for both of you.


Here are some crucial questions to ask before you get married:

Are you willing to grow up? Your own maturity level, and that of your spouse, will determine how well you all can work together in marriage and how likely   you all will be to stick with your relationship or give up on it. So each of you needs to honestly assess your current spiritual, emotional, social, and financial maturity by reflecting on issues such as how much self-control you each have, how much you respect authority, how much you can say “no” to some activities so   you can say “yes” to those that are best for you, how much peace versus drama   you have in your relationships with others, how often you keep your promises and follow through on commitments, whether or not you have a job that pays your bills, and whether or not you’re in debt.



Are you “equally yoked”? It’s never God’s will for you to be yoked (tied together) in marriage with someone you are not connected with.


Have you talked about money? We tend to overlook this vital part due to lack of trust, insecurities or Fear of the Unknown. Disclose all of your financial information to the person you’re considering marrying, and expect full disclosure from him or her, too. Talk about how each of you plans to earn, spend, save, give, and invest money if you get married, and why. If you discover that one or both of you doesn’t currently have a healthy budget or healthy money management attitudes or habits, get help and make changes before getting married to save yourselves from having to go through tremendous stress afterward. Money is good in Marriage.



Will you tell the truth? You and your future spouse must tell each other the whole truth about the romantic relationships that you’ve each had with other people previously, regardless of how wild or mild they were. Share all of the details with each other honestly, listen to each carefully. If we are meant to be, there is a certain stage we have to let it all out. So we would not be caught by surprises from the past. Though I agree we cannot remember most or all, but we can begin revealing. This puts us in a more comfortable and confident position.

Will you commit? I must confess, women especially in Nigeria commit more than Men.        Marriage as God designed it requires a lifetime commitment. So you and the person you are considering marrying should face your fears about that and discuss issues such as how you    plan to handle disagreements and crises that may come up in your future marriage, such as illness and job loss. Determine whether or not both of you are willing to trade the lives you       have now for a new life together, and whether or not you’re willing to eliminate the option of divorce and keep turning to God for the strength to keep working on your marriage. Whatever the case, Divorce should not be an option. FOR BETTER FOR WORSE.


Are you compatible? Realize that just because you love someone doesn’t mean that person is a good match for you. Honestly evaluate which personality traits   and personal habits you can live with for many decades in a future marriage, and which will drive your marriage apart. Let go of any person who isn’t truly compatible with you to save you both years of heartache.


Have you communicated your expectations? Discuss each of your expectations about married life, such as where you’d live, where you’d go to church, when you’d start trying to have children and how many children you want, and what types of careers,businesses and work hours you each hope to have. Since surprising each other after you’re married will cause lots of stress, it’s much better to talk about your expectations beforehand and see if you can reach agreements before committing to married life together.


Are you ready to marry an entire family? Get to know each other’s family backgrounds well, since each of you will carry over the attitudes and behaviours that you learned growing up into the new family that you create together. We cannot deny our in-laws. I do not know about other tribes in Nigeria, but in Yoruba land, you are married to the entire family.
Pursue healing for issues that concern either of you (such as anger management problems or addictions) and end the dating relationship if you discover character problems (such as a lack of integrity) that the person you’re considering marrying isn’t willing to address.


Are you willing to submit? Each of you must be willing to submit to Jesus in obedience in your life together, to express honor and respect for Him. That means mutually following Jesus’ example of loving service to others. Never try to control each other, but instead choose to serve each other even when doing so is difficult, just as Jesus served others when He was on Earth. Through this process in your future marriage, God will help each of you become more like Jesus.


Will you give respect? You each must also be willing to respect each other even when you don’t think that the other deserves that respect because God has made you both and highly values you. By choosing to respect your future spouse when he or she doesn’t deserve it, you can motivate your spouse to change and begin acting in ways that are worthy of respect.


Are you ready to love? Realize that love is an action, not just a feeling. Are you prepared to   continue in love towards your future spouse, even at times when you don’t like his or her behaviour? Some of the ways you’ll need to show your love include listening, protecting, providing, and serving each other, no matter what. Try to talk less and LISTEN more


Are you ready to “get naked”? Understand that sexual intimacy within marriage involves far more than just a physical connection; it also calls for a spiritual, emotional, and conversational connection. How do you plan to build the kind of relationship with each other that makes healthy and fulfilling sexual intimacy possible in your future marriage? Discuss that openly and honestly with each other.

Adapted and Developed from 12 Questions to Ask before You Marry, copyright 2011 by Clayton and Charie King.


Wednesday, June 10, 2015

6 things that wont get a lady the 2nd date

These single men have SPOKEN.
Do you want to secure a second date with that hot guy you've been excited to go out with?
As taken from a sampling of single men in their 20s and 30s, here are six things that will land you in the "no-call zone" where you WON'T be asked out for a second date:


1. You Talk Too Much
Talking too much was a first date dealbreaker for guys in both age groups. So if you have a naturally bubbly, outgoing personality, skip the caffeine before your first date. The last thing you want to do is to rev up your motor mouth, and kill the guy with word slaughter!
Tone it down. Ask him questions, let him talk, and listen to what he's saying. Make your conversation a two-way exchange, and you'll improve your chances for a second rendez-vous where an "I'll call you later" actually means he will call you later.


2. Your Internet Reputation Is NOT Good
If they haven't Googled you or checked out your Facebook profile, Twitter or Instagram before your first date, they definitely will before your second. Doing their "research" on you is an important dating ritual for these men — they want to know everything about you before they take things further, so expect them to do a little digging.
AND expect that they will ask their friends about you. If they find out you're a girl with a long, promiscuous dating history, these "good guys" might not be interested. Maybe the Bad guys which you prefer unknowingly will.


3. Your Family Troubles Scare Them
A first date isn't the best time to tell them about your crack-addicted, alcoholic, incarcerated, abusive family members. Your life may be a sad story, and hopefully you escaped the fate of your family history, but a first date isn't the time to "release the kraken" of family monsters.
That said, if a good guy senses that you're following in your family's footsteps with your own list of scary habits, they will bolt.
If you have problems, please get the help you need, so you can show your willingness to take personal responsibility and IMPROVE your chances for a callback. You meet some families, and you just change your mind. BACKGROUND is KEY.


4. You Talk Too Much About Your Ex
These guys don't want to hear all the gory details of how your ex did you wrong.
Save the dramatic story line for your
girlfriends or a therapist. This new man may be into threesomes, but not the
ghost-of-an-ex-boyfriend kind. I have had an Ex too, so why the drama? Cling to your ex and don't waste my time. IRANU.(Rubbish)


5. You're Already In The "Friend Zone"
There's no romance or spark. He's NOT that in to you — you can tell because he's not bragging and puffing up his chest to show you how macho he is.
If the tone of your first date ventures in to "friend zone" too quickly, you can expect you won't make the cut for a second date.this is a big turn off for me really.


6. You Weren't Very Polite
Whether you were late or texting too much, you didn't mind your manners.
Being on your phone too much during that first date is a big dealbreaker for these guys. Why would he want to spend time with you when you'd rather text someone else? Where is your Courtesy?Respect? Go and Date your phone if you can. It shows you are too attached.

And your tardiness? Really frustrating because it sends the message that you don't care about them and their time commitments. It's a selfish maneuver that won't get you more time with them.

www.yourtango.com/experts/joan-jerkovich/6-reasons-he-wont-ask-you-out-second-date

Monday, April 20, 2015

WHY ONLINE?

Why Online?

People are always of the opinion that studying online is tacky, doesn’t seem classy and reduces one’s prestige. They are of the view that an online degree is neither authentic nor recognised. A misconception I must say. The whole idea of studying online has always been because of the growing need to get the better side of education and still afford to work and play. The whole concept of online education is to encourage an affordable means of study like in cases where internationally acquired education is the only option. 


It’s not an easy way out neither is it a way to lavish money for no just cause, but to be frank, any one with the goal of acquiring the right education and cannot see the need to travel or cannot afford it, can actually take on an online program and achieve everything he or she wants without the fear of losing out on anything.  


The University of Essex working with Kaplan Open Learning began an online program to provide undergraduate and postgraduate degree courses online to both UK and international students that enables them to benefit from a flexible approach to study, while maintaining the quality and support you would expect from a top UK university.
University of Essex Online courses are delivered by Kaplan Open Learning (Essex) Limited, an experienced online learning provider. The University and Kaplan have grown in their partnership to offer high quality online courses.
Our structured distance learning courses allow you to work towards your degree in a unique virtual learning environment and still have access to all the support and facilities you would expect to receive on campus.


Whether you’re a student looking to enhance your professional career or a school leaver who has opted for an income and valuable work experience whilst studying for a degree, online study is a cost-effective, convenient and flexible way to do so. The University of Essex has great online programs from certificate courses to Diplomas, Bachelor top-ups, and Degrees( Law, CriminalJustice, HumanResources,  Business and Management, MBA, Marketing,Finance, InfectionControl (Public Health) etc)


With affordable tuition, flexible payment plans and course execution you can acquire a recognized academic qualification from a highly ranked school in the UK. The best part is that you are able get all the support you need at our one-stop study centre from application to enrolment and study here in Lagos, Nigeria at the Kaplan International Colleges Nigeria office, something very rare to find with most online programs. You are given access to the Virtual Learning Environment specially set up to meet all study requirements from group discussions, taking lectures, submitting assignments, using the E-library etc. 


Every student is supported throughout their online program by a dedicated Student Adviser. 
Upon Graduation, students are invited to their convocation/ceremony in the UK and are also issued Certificates that do not indicate that the course was taken online. 
For more information:
Email: ezinne.anonyuo@kaplan.com Or call  08071824661

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Chidinma Bella Okagbue aims to be MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN LAGOS PAGEANT

Chidinma Bella Okagbue is the last daughter of the royal Okagbue family.
The 18 year old beauty is a 200 level political Science student in the University of Lagos. Coming from a family not new in the entertainment industry, she follows the footsteps of her older sister Sandra Okagbue the popular model/beauty queen and Face of Delta Soap and her older brother Chris Okagbue who is also a model, actor/producer and the winner of Gulder Ultimate Search 2011. Chidinma started her modeling career not too long ago and has already done jobs with big brands like Airtel and Coca-Cola. She's an intelligent and confident young girl. Fame and popularity isn't new to her as she effortlessly stands out amongst her peers in school.
Now, she has taken another step forward in her modeling career by contesting in the highly talked about MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN LAGOS PAGEANT where she's representing Lagos-Mainland.
       Support her to achieve her dreams by liking her picture on the MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN LAGOS Facebook and Instagram pages.
Facebook link: https://t.co/simvb6FQRJ

Thursday, February 12, 2015

7 things I wish I knew before marriage

1) Marriage Is the Final Frontier

Most of the things I've learned (below) apply to both cohabitation and marriage, except this one: getting married really is different than living together unmarried even for many years . It's not just the many legal and financial benefits of marriage though. There's a psychological difference.

My husband and I lived together for several years before getting engaged, and dated several years before that, so it's not like there was much to adjust to after getting married. But maybe it's the months of preparing for a wedding (and investing thousands in it) or the knowledge of how difficult (and also expensive) divorce can be that makes the commitment more ironclad, for both you and those around you. This is it. As soon as the wedding vows are exchanged, you're on a different, accelerated life path. Before, you were being nagged about when you were going to get married. Now friends and family will be asking when you're going to have a baby (a life changer on its own). Once you have that baby, you'll be asked when you're going to give the kid a brother or sister. Everyone's in such a hurry.


Even if you're really ready for marriage and can picture the entire rest of your lives together, it's normal to wake up some days and think, "Holy shit, I'm married forever and ever??" Everyone knows marriage is a big commitment, of course. But even when getting married is a natural step in your happy relationship, years later when you're more appreciative of the decades you have ahead of yourselves, you can be floored by how extraordinary it is to commit the remainder of your life to one person.

2) You're Not Just Marrying Your Partner, You're Marrying His or Her Family Too

You know the saying "We're not losing a daughter, we're gaining a son-in-law"? Well, it works in the reverse too: You're inheriting the obligations, stresses, and, yes, benefits, of a whole new family. You might get along superbly with your significant other's family now, but once you're married they could transform into the in-laws from hell, because now you're cemented to your partner and they claim you as one of their own.

I'm the quiet sort of person who needs her space, but my husband's family is full of extroverts who don't really understand that perspective. That's caused a lot more grief over the years than it should have (I wish we had this article back then), but I'm lucky that my husband understands me and mediate when necessary. Others aren't so lucky. I've seen couples on the brink of divorce over in-law issues rather than problems specifically between the couples themselves. So my advice would be for both sides to imagine each other's family at their worst and how you two might handle any issues before they got bigger than the both of you. And, to be fair, know that bonding with your partner's family at a deeper level and becoming the daughter/son/sister/brother they always wanted is another surprising perk of marriage.

3)Say Goodbye to Taboos

There's a scene in This Is 40 where Paul Rudd's character forces his on screen wife Leslie Mann to inspect his naked bottom for haemorrhoids. It might not be as extreme as that for all couples, but after being married for some time the raw and crude things are no longer, well, raw or crude. In fact, they're like curiosities and, sometimes, obligations.

You might ask or be asked to evaluate nose hair or pull off a blackened fingernail things you would never do or ask while dating because now you two are one and almost nothing is embarrassing anymore. It's nice to always have someone there to tell you if you have broccoli between your teeth and not feel judged by it.

4)The Little Things Matter a Whole Lot More

I used to think that the best test of whether you could live with someone else forever is to ask yourself if you could put up with his or her biggest flaw or the worst version of this person for the rest of your life. I still think that's a good exercise, since people become more themselves as they age their desires, strengths, and flaws get sharper. If your partner is somewhat of a curmudgeon now, he or she will probably only become crankier and more stubborn as the years go by. Conversely, the best things you love about a person could hold you steady through the inevitable tough times.

But now I think that it's the little things you have to look for, because in the day-in/day-out of marriage, the little things add up. Little annoyances like a nail biting habit or leaving filled water glasses everywhere are really easy to overlook during a relationship when the bigger things the way your partner makes you laugh or how beautiful you feel around him or her attract your attention more. When we're "in love" we tend not to notice the small things that could drive you crazy months later, like hanging the toilet paper the wrong way.

On the flip side, it's also the small acts of everyday kindness, respect and love that keep a marriage going. Romantic gestures like buying flowers or a surprise date out are great, but they don't hold a candle to mundane things like un clogging a drain or taking over child-bathing duty. Doing chores becomes sexy in a way you would never imagine.

5)You Both Have to Change to Make the Marriage Work
The old adage that you can't change someone by marrying them still holds true. You shouldn't fall prey to "fixer-upper bias", and you probably don't want anyone to change you either. The truth is you're probably both going to have to change or adapt, as a choice, to keep the energy and love alive.

The two biggest things are learning how to fight more productively and how to communicate in ways that might not be natural to you but make more sense to the other person. Gary Chapman, who literally wrote the book on what people should know before they get married, says that people have different "love languages" or ways they express and receive love best. I'm not naturally a "toucher", but I am learning how significant just holding hands can be. It can take a long time to learn what your partner's silences mean (and don't mean), that grudges can kill a relationship, and how to adapt to the ups and downs that life is going to throw at you both.

I think every couple should go through at least one really tough time together before they get married, just to see how the other person handles such things.

6) There's No Just You Anymore
Paul Reiser in Couplehood explains it pretty well:

The problem is, when two people live together, there is no more Business of Your Own. Your Own Business is closed. You've merged and gone public. You have to run everything by the partners. And if there are too many conflicts of interest, the business may go under, freeing the partners to once again open up smaller concerns by themselves.
Like all businesses, couples engage in endless meetings to discuss areas of management concern and division of labour.
"You know, we really should call the post office and tell them to hold our mail while we're away."
"We? You mean me, don't you?"
"No, I mean we. I didn't say 'you.' I said 'we.' You or me."
"Oh really? Are you ever going to call the post office?"
A moment to think. "No."
"Then you mean 'me,' don't you?"
"Yeah."
Being part of a permanent team has its benefits. You come to rely on the other person to remember and take care of certain information (Psychologists call this transactive memory). I don't have to worry about making plans with our friends or not getting lost when driving, and he doesn't have to worry about the bills or after-school activities. (Also, I wish I had known at the start that there were some things he'll willingly do that I just assumed he hated, because I hate them: things like grocery shopping and getting rid of telemarketers. I would've had him do those things sooner.)

On the other hand, now you have to put the marriage above everything else, and might even forget what you were like when you were single and "free". It's not a bad thing, necessarily. It's just a lot of responsibility, being responsible to someone else.

7) It's a Constant Work in Progress
You might think once you've finally settled down you can relax and live happily ever after, but nothing can be farther from the truth. The years jumble together, and if you're not careful you'll easily take the marriage for granted. I didn't know it over the years, but I think the thing that's made the most difference for my marriage is our regular holidays and other traditions — things that force us to take stock again in our relationship and reconnect on a deep level. Just "being in love" isn't enough to make a marriage work.

Even after decades of living together, you'll be learning things about your partner, bit by bit, that might surprise you — or they'll suddenly change or have different priorities and needs ("Really, you want to become a scuba diver now?" and "How come you never told me you don't like olives?"). It's like a dance, and you both have to keep up with each other. But what a beautiful dance it can be.

Culled from http://www.lifehacker.com.au/2013/10/7-things-i-wish-i-had-known-before-getting-married/


Photo credits : http://www.ladybrillenigeria.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Obiora-Obiwon.jpg

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Thursday, February 5, 2015

Phone snooping, Right or Wrong?

Someone once said, "A woman investigating a man can do a better job than FBI agents."
Phone Snooping! What the heck does that mean? To check or investigate your spouse phone in an attempt to find out something especially information about someone private affairs.

By the way, different theorist with different views on phone snooping. Some are against it; some are fully/partially in support

Mind you, this issue has broken marriages, destroyed relationships, sown distrust and lots more. Needless to say the emotional, psychological and physical damages.

Recently I was at a lounge in Abeokuta with my friend Tunde. Abeokuta is the capital of Ogun state For Your Information . We were having this conversation about the forthcoming election with so much enthusiasm. Along the line, Tunde paused from the election talk to inform me that he was expecting some money in my account in which he stated the amount and asked if I have been notified by the bank.

Few minutes after that confession, the alert came in, I confirmed the transaction, notified my friend who checked and returned back my phone to me.


We continued with our discussion with our wine glasses and phones on the table. I forgot to mention to you earlier , there was this beautiful lady seated very close to me. Kemi should be in her early twenties; she appeared all dressed up in pink crop top and skinny jeans with her legs crossed. At first, she was forming diva, rolling her eyes and touching her hair at every slightest opportunity, later on, I guessed she found the dialogue interesting when she decided to chip in her own view about the election. "This election will be hot o" she said, with a sharp tone. Tunde and I stopped and looked at Kemi with disbelief on our faces. She looked at us casually and removed her face. She apologised for disrupting our chat which I did not mind anyway. We got talking and talking not until she felt so relaxed and comfortable that she grabbed my phone on the table and was snooping .

For God sake, we just met! Why is she snooping my phone? I couldn't even answer that question myself. After a minute, I asked what she was doing with my phone, to my utmost shock and disbelief, the words that emerge from her mouth were "I was just checking your messages Nah, or what are you hiding? She hissed playfully. She had the confidence to indulge into my privacy and still confirmed it. We exchanged phone numbers and left the lounge.


Some days later, we decided to hang out again but this time around Kemi came along with her friend Tola. We ordered for food and drinks and sat there for about two hours eating and chatting. When we got through with the food and our glasses of wine were about half gone. My dearest Kemi confidently took my phone again, Again? you must be wondering, Yes she was snooping with a sheepish smile.

What the heck is wrong with this lady!!! This babe will be clingy and never trust a man o. Those words rang, clear in my head. Regardless, I let her be, after all, she isn't my girlfriend or wife so I am quite convinced I owe her no explanation.

I began to wonder, is this the kind of lady, Any man would want to have something serious with? What if she was my girlfriend, fiancee or wife? I might have been dead and gone by now. Her frequent quarrels and nagging would have sent me to an early grave because every text message would either be a threat, a philandering, fornicating or adulterous act to her. Ok, back to the main meal.

I think the main reason why so many relationships come to an end today is not because a spouse is abusive or cheating alone . Somehow, it is because of the vicious conduct embedded in INSECURITY. No love or marriage relationship can grow or survive without trust. In reality, TRUST is a foundation on which a relationship is built. The moment the trust shatters, the relationship squash. If you don't trust a person, you can't even love him or her. It is important you give your spouse the benefit of doubt, watch them proof you wrong or right.

So people , let's roll;

Does your partner have a right to snoop your phone? Or would you allow your spouse snoop your phone?

What's the big deal really since we are suppose to be open to each other?

Does snooping through your spouse phone stop him/her from cheating?

I rest my case .

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Saturday, January 31, 2015

Eko Akete Night in London

Its happening now and its being sponsored by Naija FM .

If you are in London, don't dull

Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone, powered by Easyblaze

Eko Akete Night in London

Its happening now and its being sponsored by Naija FM .

If you are in London, don't dull

Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone, powered by Easyblaze

Thursday, January 22, 2015

Gboyega Nasir Isiaka pledges to develop Local Government Councils

Isiaka Pledges To Make Local Councils

THE Ogun State governorship candidate of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP), Prince Gboyega Nasir Isiaka has promised to allow local governments to operate as stipulated by the 1999 Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria if elected into office.

    He, however, berated the outgoing government of Senator Ibikunle Amosun for stifling that tier of government and making them ineffective to carry out their constitutional responsibilities as the closest tier of government to the people.

   Isiaka who was fielding questions from the panelists during the gubernatorial debate organised by the Committee For Defence of Human Rights (cdhr) in Abeokuta, said for the development to spread across all the 20 local councils in the state, government at that level should exercise a level of autonomy with little supervision from the state governor where six candidates participated.

   Governor Amosun was conspicuously absent at the gathering where candidates were asked various questions on their agenda for the state.

   The PDP candidate who assured the people of his desire to expand the economy of the state to engender development pointed out that it was the only antidote to survive the global economic meltdown and fall in the prices of petroleum products at the international market.

    He said, "We envisage no problem in getting resources to finance our four point agenda which places emphasis on welfare of the people because we have many projects, if executed, that will increase the internally generated revenue (IGR) of the state and provide employment for our teeming youths.

    "The problem we have in Ogun State now is that most of the projects being executed are not well thought out before execution, that is why contractors have left the sites but we shall complete all these projects.

    "At this critical time when there is a global economic challenges, our state needs a sound financial expert to keep us afloat and I have all it takes to do this and make our state greater".

Isiaka said he felt bad seen students of secondary schools in the state sitting down at home because the government has failed to fulfil its promises to the teachers. He said no serious government would toy with the education, which he described as the bedrock of human development.

  "The strike action embarked upon by the teachers can be averted if t
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Saturday, January 17, 2015

Mariah Carey and Nick Canno Divorce saga

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon have a prenup with a confidentiality clause ... and if she blabs out of school she gets socked for twice what he'd have to pay if he violates it.Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ ... if Nick violates the confidentiality clause he has to pay her a $250,000 penalty, but if she spills the beans she has to pay him $500K.And the prenup makes it clear ... Mariah came into the marriage with a boatload of money ... Nick, not so much.The prenup says Mariah is worth $150 million .

she has so much, $30 million is listed as "miscellaneous." Nick came into the marriage in 2008 with a little less than $500K.He's done well since then, making millions on his various projects, but when they married he ended up buying her engagement ring for $500,000 but took a loan out for $470K. The ring was reportedly worth $2.5 mil, but that's not what he paid.As we reported ... they've already worked out a full property settlement agreement.
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Prince Adeyemi Oderinde-Mike

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Gboyega Nasir Isiaka's history

   
  PASSPORT FOR SERVICE
Despite the daunting socio-economic, financial and family challenges, I ensured that the early obstacles did not deter me from seeking and acquiring the best in education and personal development training. My quest for excellence began from the Ansar-Ud-Deen Primary School, Imeko between 1968 and 1973 after which I proceeded to Nazareth High School Imeko between 1973 and 1978.

Between this period and admission into the higher institution, I worked as a Clerical Officer at Yewa (then Egbado) North Local Government; and later Office of the Presidential Liaison Officer, Abeokuta. My first point of call for my higher education was the Moshood Abiola Polytechnic, Abeokuta where I was admitted to study Mass Communication in 1981. While there for a few months I realised I was not fulfilled with the career path I was towing and I consequently left the school  to pursue a University admission. I was offered admission into the University of Ife (now OAU) to study Accounting in 1982. With hard work and commitment, I graduated by 1986 and was awarded a Bachelor of Science Degree in Accounting (B.Sc Accounting) in the First Class.
While in the university, I was the Director of Organisation, Yewa (then Egbado) Students Association in 1983/1984 and became the President in 1984/1985. Major highlight of my activities in the association was giving Career talk and organising what was then called the "Brain Trust Competition" among Secondary Schools in Yewa. I proceeded for the one year compulsory NYSC programme in Jos, Plateau state in 1987 with my place of primary assignment at Joseph Akande & Co. Chartered Accountants. My duties were auditing and accounting.

By 1988, I qualified as a Chartered Accountant. In search of knowledge at a higher level, I completed my Masters in Business Administration (MBA) from University of Lagos in 1995. I further attended the Senior Management Programme (SMP) from the Lagos Business School in 1998. With over a decade of post Associate membership, I became a Fellow of the Institute of Chartered Accountants (FCA) in 2003.

In addition to being a Chartered Accountant, I am also an Associate, Chartered Institute of Stockbrokers (ACIS) having completed the institutes three stage examinations, and an Associate member of the Chartered Institute of Taxation of Nigeria (CITN). In furtherance of my bid to attain leadership excellence, I have taken several leadership courses in different parts of the world including Leadership in the 21st Century from the prestigious John F. Kennedy Centre, Harvard University, United States of America in 2009. All these academic certifications, post graduate qualifications, fellowships and honoraria were achieved by dint of hard work, forthrightness, humility and trust in my creator who has been my strength and pillar in times of challenges.

  VISA FOR HIGHER CALLING
PRIVATE SECTOR
I believe the many experiences I have had both in the private and public life is for a purpose. The initiative is to consolidate the beautiful work on ground and take the "GATEWAY state TO GREATNESS" level of Human dignity. The rigour and efforts I put into all these academic milestones was never going to be a waste and upon the completion of my youth service, I was retained at Joseph Akande & Co. Chartered accountants; and for about a year, I was in charge of audit and accounts of all the business of the organisation before leaving in 1989.

I joined Lion Bank in 1989 where I functioned in the Audit department. I was able to use my professional knowledge and experience to assist in strengthening the internal control in various spheres of the Bank. My foray into investment banking commenced with my employment in ICON (Merchant Bankers) in 1990, I worked with the Capital Issues and Investments department after a rigorous three months training by the Bank.

In February 1996, I joined Lead Merchant Bank Plc where I was involved in various Wholesale and Investment Banking activities including Project financing, Financial Advisory, Privatisation  Advisory, Equity and Debt raising activities. I was also involved in Asset Management and Stockbroking under the Lead Investment Limited brand of Lead Bank. I rose through the ranks to the position of Assistant General Manager (AGM) and Head of the Investment Banking Group overseeing both Investment Banking Group and Lead Investment Limited. During this period, I led various capital raising transactions that include equity raising for First Bank Plc, Union Bank Plc, Afribank Plc, Lion Bank plc, Nigerian German Chemical Plc as well as Advisory service for the privatisation of Nigerdock Plc. During the period, the Bank won the best Issuing House in Nigeria for three consecutive years i.e. 2001 to 2003. Quite importantly, I was a member of the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) committee on new products and processes in the Nigerian Capital market as well as member of the Technical Committee of Association of Issuing Houses of Nigeria.


PUBLIC SERVICE

My exposure to public service came by when in November 2003, Ogun State Governor, Otunba Gbenga Daniel appointed me as his Special Assistant on Investments; and in April 2004 as the pioneer Group Managing Director of the Gateway Holdings Limited, the Investment Company of the State. I took up the challenge as usual and set in motion a blueprint which has made the organisation the success it is today. Gateway Holdings is indeed a success story today as I and my team had achieved our mandate especially in the areas of Project development and Structuring, Investment Management and Trade Finance.

Gateway Holdings spearheaded and/or assisted in the development of various projects in the state in the last six years including but not limited to Ogun state First Industrial park, Grand Manufacturers Cement Company, Urea Plant, Nahman Gateway Asphalt Limited, Ogun Guangdong Free Trade Zone and Gateway Savings & Loans Limited to mention a few. Investments and committed investments from these sources are in excess of 500million dollars. The company has also been involved in the  identification of investors and project structuring of Gateway International Airport and OK deep seaport projects.

Also, assets and investments that are either drain pipes to the state or being grossly underutilised  or outrightly bankrupt have been restructured and their values enhanced through different variants of Public Private partnerships. These include the Gateway Hotels in Abeokuta, Ota, Ijebu Ode, and Lomiro Oil Palm plantations. Investments attracted to the state through these in the last six years are in excess of ₦4billion while employments and potential employment generated are in their thousands.

Furthermore, Gateway Holdings Ltd consolidated the shareholding of the state and ensured an optimal and  effective management of the state's quoted stocks which hitherto were not only scattered in various ministries and parastatals of government but were being poorly managed. In addition to the stock investments, the Company invested for the state in various other businesses including a multimillion dollar cement manufacturing plant; a petroleum storage plant; and a Special |Purpose Vehicle that invested in an oil drilling firm.

Gateway Holdings also funds and manages the state empowerment programme in transportation. i.e. the State Metro Scheme under which over 650 motorcycles, 600 taxis and 150 buses have been given out to the indigenes of the state under a short/medium lease arrangement. The Company also financed the leasing of tractors to farmers during the period. Also, Gateway Holdings in partnership with the private  sector has pioneered  the dredging of Ogun River which has not only assisted in provision of basic infrastructure like roads, schools and community centres to the villages around the area; but which will also facilitate water transportation in the state in not too distant future.

The company has carried out many other activities which though may not have generated immediate income for the state but have great impact on the socio-economic development of the state including the structuring of the financing of 42MW power plant currently under construction; the establishment of Abeokuta trading floor of The Nigerian Stock Exchange and the establishment of the Ogun Shandong Business Council which is aimed at enhancing business relationship and joint venture between private business men in Ogun state and Shandong province in China.

The cumulative positive effects of the activities of Gateway Holdings under my leadership are legion and these have to a large extent contributed to the enhancement of  the economic base of Ogun State, generating employment and empowerment for the people of Ogun state, utilising the natural resources and other competitive advantages of the state and more importantly, we have been able to record respectable returns on our investments and generate revenue to the Sate Government; all to the benefit of the people of Ogun state.

Still along the line of public service, it is imperative to note that I also served in different capacities such as Chairman, Ogun Guangdong Free Trade Zone Working implementation committee; member, Ogun Finance Committee under the State Ministry of Finance; member Economic Summit Planning committee and member, Ogun State Economic Advisory Council (EAC) among others. In all of these call to service, I distinguished myself and comported myself creditably with no infraction recorded against my name. From some of my modest achievements of Gateway Holdings team under my humble leadership, it is safe to say that my modest accomplishments in the private and the wealth of experience I have garnered in public service has adequately equipped me with the necessary skill, vision and capacity  to take Ogun state from "GOOD TO GREAT"


  HONOURS AND AWARDS
These milestones have not gone unnoticed by various strata of the Ogun society. Hence, several awards and plaudits have come my way. They include the following:

·         Good Leadership Award by the Network for Good Leadership in Nigeria.
·         Distinguished Alumnus & Excellence in Public Service by Obafemi Awolowo University Alumni Association.
·         Award of Excellence by Federal University of Technology, Akure.
·         Leadership Award by Nigerian Association of Agricultural Students, Olabisi Onabanjo University, Aiyetoro campus.
·         Patron, National Association of Small Scale Industries (NASSI) Ogun state branch.
·         Award of Excellence by the National Association of Ogun State Students, Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife.
·         Prestigious Abeokuta City Award by Indy Media
·         Life Patron, National Association of Yewa Students (MAPOLY)
·         The most gender friendly for the year 2009 in Ogun state by Voice of Women International.
·         Merit Award for immense contribution to the progress of Igan Okoto by Oba Alayeluwa Mukaila Akanbi  Salako and Council of Chiefs, Igan Okokto.  
·         Golden Train of Ogun state Investment by Olabisi Onabano University.
·         Distinguished Director of the Year 2006 by National Association of Yewa Student.
·         Merit Award by Aiyetoro Recreation Club
·         Recognition Award for contribution  to development of Agriculture by Federal University of Technology (School of Agriculture & Agricultural Technology)
·         Award of Excellence by Nazareth High School Old Students Association.
·         Merit Award by the Jamhiyat Nuru Samodani Foundation (JANSAF).
·         Award of Excellence by Pentecostal Methodist Church, Imeko.
These are but a few of such numerous recognitions.


  FAMILY AND LEISURE
Gboyega Isiaka is not all about academics, professionalism and administrative excellence; I am also a family man. I am happily married to my darling of many years, Mrs. Jelilat Oluwatoyin Isiaka and we are blessed with lovely children. On a lighter and personal level, Gboyega is social, jovial and relatively outgoing but a little reserved and cautious. I belong to a number of social associations and clubs. Such include the Prestigious IKoyi Club 1938 Lagos, Rock Beach Resort Abeokuta, Rotary Club of Sagamu Central and the Yewa Metropolitan Club Ilaro among others. My membership of this elite groups have also broadened my views about life and the necessary social interaction needed to harness the potentials of men.

In the course of my duties both in private and public life, I have had cause to travel to various nations of the world in pursuit of one noble goal or the other including, United States of America, United Kingdom, Peoples Republic of China, United Arab Emirates, Germany, France, Malaysia, Brazil, Taiwan, South Africa among others. I have established strategic social and economic relationships with high net-worth individuals and blue-chip organizations, which have greatly enhanced my experience, broadened my horizon and equipped me with internationally conformed social, economic and political skills which I will bring to bear on governance in Ogun state.
I also sincerely believe that posterity has placed me in a position to serve the good people of Ogun state and I will do it with your support and trust. In another document, I have carefully articulated my Vision for Ogun state, my Mission to the government house, Our Policy Thrust and a concise Action Plan to take Ogun,  the "GATEWAY state TO GREATNESS" level it has been truly prepared for; building on the good works of the last eight years. This is the irreducible minimum I will offer my people when elected the governor of Ogun state.

  MY PARTY, MY POLITICS
POLITICAL HISTORY
I was a bit apolitical in my early life  but the involvement of my family in politics ensured I sooner than later got involved; especially when one consider the fact that my father, Late Pa T. Ade Isiaka was a notable  politician in Yewa land. I began my political journey right from my university days when in 1983/84, I was elected the Director of Organisation of the Egbado (now Yewa) Students Association of the University of Ife. I was subsequently elected the President of the Association in the 1984/85. Thereafter, my politics was basically in the boardrooms of corporate organisations and some of the experiences were invaluable and revealing.

PARTY AFFILIATION & IMPACTS
I am a member of the largest political party in Sub-Saharan Africa, the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP). I am from Imeko ward in Imeko Afon Local government area of Ogun state and I have been a dedicated member of the party. Since the last seven years, I have played active roles in my party from the ward level to the state level. I have been involved in a number of activities for different developmental purposes of the party. I have privately initiated empowerment initiatives for our people especially students, artisans, market women and the elderly both within my party and outside. More specifically, I have used my position in government to positively affect a lot of Ogun indigenes in form of lease of metro cars, buses as well as tractors for agricultural purposes.

POLITICAL PHILIOSOPHY
My politics conform with that of the new generation of leaders all over the world that believe in using the experience they have gathered through the achievements in their private endeavours for the benefit of larger society. Basically, I believe in the politics of engagement, politics of issues, politics without bitterness and politics of objective criticism. For me, politics is essentially the vehicle for service to the people and a medium to impact society. Also, the hallmark of a good leader is to leave a generation better than they met it.

To be a successful manager of men and resources, which is what governance essentially entails; a politician should be disciplined in thoughts, emotions and actions. As a man with deep social interaction, I believe politicians should constantly engage with the people, who are the owners of power. The thoughts and feelings of the people should be the driver of government initiatives. I believe that by my experience and modest achievements so far, I have internalised these attributes which I hope will be relevant to taking the "GATEWAY state TO GREATNESS".

Thank you and God bless Ogun state.

GBOYEGA NASIR ISIAKA  B.SC, MBA FCA, ACIS, ACIT

Gboyega Nasir Isiaka GNI's Manifesto

Gboyega Nasir Isiaka - GNI For Governor, OGUN 2015 shared the following link and had this to say about it:

Our Manifesto is built on four strong pillars namely:
• Expanding our economy
• Providing quality social services,
• Strengthening our people and the society and
• Energising government and the polity.
This manifesto is hinged on delivering A Life More Abundant for our people and it contains and aligned with, the objectives of our great Party; the Peoples Democratic Party of Nigeria, as stated in Article 7 of the Party Constitution. It is a determination to get the better of today and the best of the future. It preaches hope, gives hope and engenders hope in our people.
One cornerstone of our plan is a special focus on our border areas, especially our towns and communities that border Lagos and some of our West African neighbours. We shall create Border Towns Development Commission to accelerate the integration and development of areas including but not limited to Mowe, Ibafo, Arepo, Magboro, Iseri, Akute, Ogijo, Tongeji, Ijoko etc.

Above all, the programme is about our people; hence, policies and programs in areas like health, education, infrastructure, empowerment, agriculture & integrated rural development, sports & youth development and security are ultimately geared towards the well-being of our people.

Our agenda is to align our systems, processes and outcomes to that of a modern state where things work for all. We will conduct the act of governance with vision and strong leadership that will put our dear state on the path of peace, opportunity, and prosperity for generations to come.

I hereby offer myself as a symbol of that leadership and vision. The vision of a free, fair and prosperous state that offers opportunities for our people, and a leadership with sincerity, purpose & character to drive that vision. This is achievable and our State shall be great again.

Monday, January 5, 2015

Side effects & solution to self service

In recent time, watching Indecency and practice of self-service has increase drastically in our society especially among the youth. This can be trace down to the easy access of pornographic materials in the internet through computer and mobile phones. And a lot of Indecency website are available for accessibility with daily updates of assorted Indecency videos, and the more you watch, the more you want to watch and before you know it , you are trapped to it, it becomes a habit difficult to break. Indecency and self-service are like brothers, they go hand in hand. Indecency viewers are prone to self-service. A lot of young people (mostly men ) indulge in this act without knowing the implication. They end up suffering from the ugly side effect without even knowing the root of their problem.
Below , I will tell you some side affects of watching Indecency and self-service and a natural way to cure yourself from them if you are already a victim .

1. Erectile dysfunction : This is the inability of a man to obtain a full Attention when about to have sex with a woman. Excessive Indecency and self-service does mess with your ability to get turned on in real, intimate situations. You discover you only get a full Attention while watching Indecency but when with a woman you will have a weak or no Attention. This is because your brain has been wire through excessive Indecency and self-service to believe that all you need to satisfy your sexual urge is to feed yourself with Indecency and self-service . Our brain is like a fertile land, whatever you plant on it (whether good or bad ) is what you will harvest. Some guys when they experience this Indecency induces erectile dysfunction ( which is very embarrassing ) feels the best thing is to forget about women and focus on further watching of Indecency and self-service thereby causing more damages .

2. Premature expulsion (5seconds man): This is a situation whereby a guy ejaculates too early when with a woman. Here, Erupt can take place sometimes even before penetration ( during pre-intimacy ) or too soon after penetration, after which the man becomes weak and unable to achieve another Attention. This problem is likely experience by people who stating self-service at an early age. This is because you have train your nervous system to Erupt very quickly (or while partially erect). When you are younger, while self-servicing you want to Erupt quickly because of the fear of being caught by your parents or siblings. So you teach your mind that when you are hard your job is to Erupt as quickly as possible and not relax and enjoy the long sensation. Over the years of self-service, your brain has been wire to believe that the response to an Attention is quick expulsion. When with a real woman you will notice you still experience same thing.

3. Delay expulsion (low sensation) : This is a situation where a man is unable to achieve orgasm/expulsion when having sex with a woman. Delay expulsion often go in hand with weak Attention and it's cause by prolong Indecency and self-service coupled with holding back expulsion. Holding back expulsion while self-service is when a man stimulates his p**is with his hand or whatever he does that with to a point of release and then stops, wait until the sensation comes down, after which he resumes again and repeat same for several minutes or hours before finally allowing himself to expulsion , this act is called EDGING . This is done to elongate the self-service session to enjoy it more. The reason you're unable to Erupt during sex with a woman is because you are completely desensitized. The level of sensation which you are suppose to have while having sex with a woman is low due to over-stressed sexual nerve. When you wash a new cloth all the time (whether it's dirty or not) it fades away or depreciate and becomes like an old cloth. That's it .

3. Weakness (low testosterone) : In men testosterone is a hormone produced primarily in the testicles. It is what makes a man to be a man. Testosterone in men is responsible for larger muscles, stronger bone, hair growth, deeper voice and a stronger sex. Women also produce testosterone in the ovaries and adrenal glands , but at a lower levels than men, that's why they have smaller muscles, softer voice, less hairy and a weaker sex drive. Testosterone as said is produce in the testicles in men , that's why if a man is castrated he loses all the powers of a man and becomes like a woman. When a man ejaculates, he loses some amount of his testosterone. That is the reason why you experience weakness after expulsion. People who indulge in excessive self-service are likely to suffer a low testosterone. That is when you see a man of 27yrs looking like a 17yrs old boy, or a man with a behavioral attributes of a woman.

4. Loneliness: People (man/woman) who indulge in watching Indecency and self-service often end up lonely and depressed. They rather prefer to stay indoor for a week or more with their computer or phone viewing all assorted sets of Indecency and self-servicing on them rather than go out to meet real people. Due to this they grow to be uncomfortable around real people especially the opposite sex.

5. Severe social anxiety: This is the inability to be confidence and relax while in public. People (male and female) who are into acute Indecency and self-service are prone to have low self esteem. They have problem of inferiority complex when among their peers. This is as a result of all the above other listed problems induce by Indecency and self-service, it puts the victim in a life of shame and embarrassment. You hear your peers talking about their different real sex experiences , you feel bad because you know it's embarrassing to share your own Indecency and self-service sessions with them. You know you are having problem but you are ashame to discuss it with anybody.

The above problems as long as it is induce by Indecency/self-service cannot be cured medically by drugs. It is a psychological problem and can only be correct by a psychological treatment. Your brain has been sexually wired wrongly and needs to be rewired correctly to it's normal form. The method of re-wiring your brain here is known as REBOOTING . It is a system whereby you wipe out from your brain all the wrongs you have input in it about sex . When your brain is now neutral , you can then input the right things about sex and you will see that all your problems will vanish. It is practically like formatting a phone or like clearing the weeds on a fertile land and replacing it with good plants. Sounds magical? Don't worry I will tell you how it is done. In case you are waiting for me to give you set of rules you will not find them - other than: "No Indecency/ No self-service/No sex/ No any kind of artificial sexual stimulation for 90 days" By artificial I mean sexual pix, audio and literature. Also no Indecency substitutes allowed, such as: surfing woman pictures on Facebook or dating sites, cruising Craigslist, underwear ads, YouTube videos, "Intimate literature", etc. Some people might say that's very difficult or impossible, how can I not watch Indecency, self-service or have sex for a whole 90 days ? Yes, it's difficult but not impossible, Once you know how something works and how it affects you, it's much easier to muster the willpower
to make a change if you so wish. You have to do what it takes to help yourself get better and have a normal life. To achieve a good result, any time you lose yourself and watch Indecency/self-service/sex during your rebooting , you have to start all over , by starting all over I mean if you lose yourself on day 13 ,you have to start all over from day 1 again.

What to experience during/after rebooting:

1. Flat-line period:
This occurs within the 90 days rebooting. During the flatline period you will observe that you had lose total interest in sex, there will be no early morning Attention, your pen*s shrinks and becomes smaller as such that sometimes you will feel like you have no pen*s, you only remember you have a pen*s when you want to urinate. Whenever you experience this, do not panic but be happy because it's a sign that your re-booting is working. The flatline signifies that your brain has wiped out all the sexual data you installed in it and now restoring to its original settings. The period of flatline may last up to several weeks or months depending on individuals. The flatline period ends with a sudden early morning Attention ( full Attention) , this signifies that your rebooting was successful and you can then go on and enjoy a normal sex life absent of erectile problem, premature expulsion, delay expulsion e.t.c .
More things to notice during or after your rebooting include: a deeper voice , you become attractive to the opposite sex, you no longer panic when around the opposite sex, your self confidence increases, your social anxiety disappears, change in character( the way you talk ,walk, sit and stand show a new confidence ) e.t.c
NOTE: If after adequate rebooting for 90 days , your sexual problem persist, you can then seek a medical help. Different people get cured at different time within the 90 days reboot, as long as you have experience the flatline period and then the sudden early morning Attention, know that you are cured, you can stop the rebooting if you like . This means that it's not a must that you will reboot for 90 days . But, after 90 days of rebooting , if your sexual problem persist (then it's not a psychological problem) , seek a medical help.

http://www.nairaland.com/2077982/side-effects-indecency-self-service-how